A much younger, blonder, and fitter woman posted this on FaceBook awhile back:
She thought it was funny.
She really has NOOOO idea.
What is the difference between a 32-year old and an actual 39-year old?
The 32-year old wears yoga pants to yoga class.
A 39-year old wears yoga pants because they fit, and because they provide the ILLUSION of going to yoga class… she hopes. Hey, it happens sometimes.
Yoga pants also go with anything! They look equally fantastic with boots and cute knee-highs OR with sneakers and anklets. You can wear them anywhere: the store, school drop-off, school pick-up, the laundry room, AND the kitchen. You can even wear them to the gym (but only if you manage to get off Facebook in time to make it to your class).
The 32-year old drinks wine in bars, on dates, with friends.
But the 39-year old drinks wine because, as I told my kiddo last night, ahem… “It’s good for your heart.” (So convenient! Because it’s ALSO good for inducing a state of zen-like detachment from the end-of-day bickering, whining, and refusals to go to bed. That must be why it’s so good for your heart.)
As is dark chocolate.
That store should TOTALLY sell dark chocolate.